her

So she is having a baby. I hate her. I hate her for being happy, I hate her for being married, for being selfish and everything. I hate her. I hate my aunt right now for not returning money she borrowed. I hate my sons' paternal grandmother for saying i neglect him when i don't just so she can try to take him. I hate my boyfriend for not wanting to take our relationship a step further. I hate him for making me feel insignificant and my needs do not matter. I hate his friends for being the losers they are. I hate him for liking his losers better than me. I sometimes wish he would break up with me because he is never going to marry me and live with me, so what is the purpose of this relationship? I love my children and sometimes I want another one.. BUT right now I been thinking of getting permanently fixed.. for good... i do not see why i should not. I hate myself right now